Family meals are worth the time

September is “National Family Meals Month”

Did you know that September is National Family Meals Month?  Started in 2015 with a campaign to highlight the benefits and importance of eating family meals together, the campaign keeps growing.  As we get back into the hustle and bustle of school, sports and other after school activities it’s important to not let family connections take a back seat to all those busy things.

When schools, and everything else, shut down in 2020 my family and I got to rediscover the simple joys of eating family meals together.  When the boys were little we ate dinner together as a family every night.  Eating together was non-negotiable as was sitting at a table.  Of course it was very easy then.  The boys had maybe one or two nights of some sport practice or another and those were early enough that with a little bit of planning we could all eat together at a reasonable time. 

Family meals can be a challenge

Sometime in the past few years they grew, a lot, and so did their activities.  Our oldest swims 6 days a week, 2 hours each day and except for Saturday those happen at night.  Our younger son swims 5 days a week at a different time than his brother.  My daughter and I drive back and forth to the pool dropping off and picking up.   To make it more fun, we also squeeze in swim lessons (for her), soccer and flag football. My husband coaches swimming on top of his regular job.  Most days he leaves with the younger one and comes back with the oldest. This is our normal 11 months out of the year. All this craziness means that we are rarely all at home when dinner time comes.  We eat together as a family on the weekends as much as we can but I miss the time we had when the boys were little. 

An unlikely gift…

The pandemic driven shutdown in March 2020 brought with it an unexpected gift for us, daily family meals.  For the first time in about 6 years we got to enjoy each other’s company without worrying about who had to rush off where and when.  Now, swimming is back and so is school and with it the challenge of the family meal.  To be honest, I miss the daily family dinners and not having to cook to a very strict timeline.  I like to cook but cooking to a schedule takes something out of the experience. Cooking to a rigid schedule is not going to change but I am trying to figure out how to squeeze in more family meals (than just the weekend) and what those might look like.

… highlights different options

I know that all of us together during the week is a pipe dream.  My husband heads out to coach at 4:30 and the likelihood of dinner being ready by 4 pm is nil.  So our family meals during the week include the kids and I. It may not be everyone in the house but it counts.  My husband and I eat lunch together (since we both work from home most of the time now) to catch up to make up for those missed weekday dinners.  We hang out with the boys during breakfast before school to make sure they have healthy options to eat then and in their lunch bag.  We talk about the day ahead to make sure we are engaged and connected.  Eating together on the weekend is a non-negotiable, even if not every meal is included.

Benefits of eating together are many

Why do I share all this?  I want you to know that I do not live in a bubble where meals magically appear and everyone hops and skips to a beautifully set table.  Sharing family meals takes work and planning.  It was way easier to do when the boys were little, even with a long commute.  The older my kids get the more complicated our schedule.  It takes serious project management skills and thinking out of the box to make it work now.  So why make the effort?  Besides enjoying each others company, there are other benefits.

  • Families who eat together (at home) have higher fruit and vegetable consumption and lower rates of obesity
  • Sharing family meals helps develop and sustain social skills well into adulthood.
  • Each meal shared reduces the risk of depression, suicide, drug use, violent behavior and risky behavior.
  • Sharing family meals is linked with higher grades and higher self-esteem

Of course besides the tangible clinical benefits, family meals help us slow down and reconnect with one another.  We get to find out about the exciting things that happenned and make plans for future adventures.  We eat slower and, while listenning to others, get a chance to appreciate the food we eat more (a little mindful eating at work).  Preparing meals makes us more cognizant of the ingredients, where they came from and how they impact our body.  Cooking at home gives us another opportunity to work together to make something we all enjoy. 

There are many ways to share meals together

Cooking together
Couple cooking together

Family meals are good for all of us.  The skills gained in helping prepare them, sharing table manners, social discourse and clean up, are something that have benefits beyond that 30 minutes.  We get to slow down enough to see how quickly the kids are growing and make a connection with our partners as well as our bodies.  No, the whole family meal process is not easy.  It takes a little bit of time, effort and planning but the benefits are many.  Family meals do not have to mean everyone eating at a table.  A kitchen island, patio, picnic or even burgers around a fire pit all qualify if you are together.  Even if not everyone can make it to every meal, the more family members the better.

Staying connected requires purpose.  Wishing you could spend more time with your loved ones is not going to make it happen.  Creating a plan can help make it happen.  Get everyone involved in planning, preparing and execution, not just eating.  The time spent working towards the family meal can be just as valuable as eating together.  Drinking your coffee, while helping your kids get their breakfast and lunches together before school, counts. Letting them take on more and more of those tasks, as they get older, is a valuable skill they will thank you for (eventually).  Regardless of who does what work, the time spent together is an opportunity too valuable to miss.

“National Family Meals Month”

This September, and beyond, I encourage you to find your own way of sharing family meals.  Family meals do not require dining tables and fancy dishes.  Whether it’s every day, dinner, breakfast, weekend meals or any time you can eat together, approach them with fun and purpose.  We can all find our own version of a “family meal” and benefit from the experience.

Read about “National Family Meals Month” and find additional resources by visiting Family Meals Initiative website.

Eating together as a family may not always be easy but it is possible. Creative solutions to eating healthy, and eating together, can help you reap the benefits as a family. You can discover many options that fit your life through my programs and books. Find the details the Programs and Services  and Book tabs. You can also preview course content and register on my online school dashboard.

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