If you have ever tried to change something in your life such as losing weight or pursuing a career dream you have no doubt come across many ideas for setting expectations for results. There is no shortage of before and after images in our connected reality that create the perception of massive changes and overnight success. These snapshots create focus on the results but fail to show the substance in the middle, the path and steps that create those results. The end result, many myths, grand expectations and lots of disappointments that affect our mindset and sour us on being able to achieve success before we even try. Change myths and all this readily available “data” has conditioned us to think that others have it easy while we have to work so hard and fail often so why even try. Unfortunately we fail to realize that the information we get is flawed and limited, we see the end result, the beautiful vacation pictures, the perfect family photos, and the skinny people at the gym, the fairytale lives successful people lead; we see nothing about “how” they got there. But real change and achieving your dreams is all about the “how”.
Never ask yourself, “Can I do this?” Ask instead, “How can I do this?” – Dan Zara
When you want to change something in your life, weight, health, fitness, or career, the impossible standards and expectations around us often leave us stuck on “if we can do it?” and we fail to move beyond it. We fail to realize that being in the “if” and “can I do it?” place does not move us forward but keeps up firmly in the status quo. Until we move beyond “can I do this?” and ask “how can I do this” we cannot move past possibility and into reality. Asking “can I do this?” opens the door for all the reasons why something will not work or be worth it and places a pause on taking actions to achieve it. There will always be reasons not to do something no matter how small (changing my dinner plates to a smaller size is not going to work for me, it’s too expensive, it’s just going to leave me hungry after dinner, and besides I can judge how much food I put on a plate), the key is to realize that there is one sure way to not reach a goal, and that is to do nothing and every excuse for not doing something is another way to guarantee that result. When you stop asking if and acknowledge you want it, you can stop the flow of excuses and start asking the right question “how can I do this” to begin planning your actions for success. For many of us this is the first step to success in whatever we want to achieve and is often the hardest, so before you abandon your dreams think about your mindset and ask yourself “have I been asking the right question?”
“If you want to do something, you find a way. If you don’t want to do something, you find an excuse.” – Jeff Goforth
If you have questions about wellness, nutrition, personal change and action planning for success feel free to CONTACT ME. I also encourage you to check out the Programs page for the latest in online and local in-person offerings (CT, MA).